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I wanted to write to you to apologise. For a long time, I have wondered at how the world has been so captivated by you all because of a leaked sex tape and the fact that you have obscene amounts of cash. But now I get it. The more I see and hear of you, the more I realise you are pulling the biggest con since George Bush Jr and the WMDs. I am, after viewing your presidential campaign ad, convinced that you have been duping us all with your bubble-headed, party girl facade. I never thought I’d say this, but I actually think you are funny, and a helluva lot more intelligent than you come across. Of course the whole search for a BFF in a TV show, and the attempt at a music career may or may not be intentionally ironic, but well done and if I was an American, you’d have my fake vote.


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