Sometimes I just love the kinds of news headlines I see on Yahoo when I log in to my email.

‘Huge Catfish Chokes to Death on Soccer Ball’

This is serious news, people. It could spark an international incident. Said Dead German Catfish was found with a blue and white ball in its mouth… Could it be a terrorist attack by the Greeks? Or was it some crazed Euro Soccer fan who swore off The Beautiful Game forever after Germany lost and tossed his/her ball into the murky depths of the canal? I think a more important question that should be raised is – how the hell did a 2-metre long catfish end up in a Bavarian canal? German police are investigating, thank goodness!

‘”Mini Me” Actor’s Sex Tape To Be Reposted Online’

Excellent news! I am so sad I missed it when it first hit the Internet. Honestly, what is the fascination with Little People sex? Are people curious to find out if their small stature equals small appendages? (incidentally, our doctor friend assures us that with his type of ‘littleness’, he will be in proportion). I have yet to read the article to find out why they decided to repost it. Fans have complained? His career needs a boost (look what it did for Paris Hilton)? He’s sick of doing Mike Myers movies? He took The Love Guru hype too far? Who CARES!

‘Golden Eagle Falls Prey To Lioness At Vancouver Zoo’

Good to know the lion’s instinct is still intact, but what made this article hilarious is that the opening lines of one publication’s article began with ‘Two children are recovering after witnessing a lioness kill a Golden Eagle at the Vancouver zoo.’ Shame. Haven’t they watched The Lion King? It’s the circle of life man. And how different to the kinds of headlines and articles we get back home.

I love Canada.

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